Dealing with toxic people

Tips for dealing with those people who make our lives more difficult

We all know at least one person that we just can’t stand (we hope for your sake it isn't your boss). Certain people seem to be motivated by making others miserable, attacking their victims’ self-esteem and altering their emotional equilibrium.

According to communications expert Lillian Glass in her book “Toxic People”, there are certain guidelines that we can follow to make it easier to live with these destructive folk:

Release tension. When someone is truly unbearable and does nothing more than bug everybody else, those around him or her secrete more adrenaline (the hormone related to stress), the heart beats faster, and breathing is affected. To prevent a toxic person from having this effect on you, breathe through the mouth for approximately two seconds, hold your breath while you count to three, release the air and wait for two more seconds without breathing.

Stop thinking about it. The best thing to do is to think positive and use phrases about oneself, like: “I can't wait to get home to have a warm bath and relax”, when it all gets too much for you.

Put yourself in his shoes. This is about trying to make the toxic person see just how he himself behaves by behaving in the same way.

Confront him directly. Sometimes, the only way to deal with the situation is to tell the toxic person that he is bothering you and explain in what way. That said, stay calm and don’t lose your cool.

Fantasize. Or what amounts to the same thing, imagine what you would like to do to the guy, but without actually doing it (obviously…). This helps exorcize bad vibes.

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